So I didn’t forget that I was planning to fill y’all in on the rest of the weekend.

Let’s start with I.HO.P at 2am! Now I know every city has to have a jail but did every patron of the Galveston I.HO.P have to look like they just got out!!!! One of my girls is married and has been living in the burbs for 6 or 7 years and let’s just say she was not quite used to “our” people in the wee hours of the morning. She just sat there looking like somebody might jump out from behind the counter and snatch her purse. But I digress…. one chick had on this TIGHT (and I don’t mean as in good looking) denim skirt with a huge gold lame belt. Now if you are more than healthy… must you call more attention to yourself?? And of course when she was done…. she left out that bad boy with the belt wide open! Then a fight nearly breaks out and they have to escort a dude out of the fine dining establishment! NUTS! My girl was a little tipsy by then and had told us the EXACT same story roughly 3 times in 2 hours. She cracks me up!

Before I get to my wedding story… let me just say that the liquor store in Galveston was like no other I have ever seen and I grew up in the for real hood in Chicago! Where else can you get your check cashed in the same spot where you are gonna get your liquor! Craziness!!! First of all there was a motorcycle parked inside… yes I said INSIDE the liquor store! Next there was motor oil and fuel injection treatments right next to the snack cakes. And to top it all off the owner let his 75lb dog roam around the store. And of course the patrons were quite fitting for the location. One chick looked to be about 7 months pregnant (well at least I hope she was pregnant) was picking up her 2 40 oz bottles of beer (yes 40s like in Boyz in the Hood). Most of the dudes were missing more than a few teeth and the ones they did have looked like Indian Corn (yuck!)

The rehearsal lunch was at one of the Galveston hotels. Let’s just say that I am a bit of a snob and was not pleased about getting all dressed up to have a burger! Especially since we didn’t really rehearse the wedding ceremony at all.. we just got some brief instructions. The bride was almost 2 hours late for the event because she was getting her hair done. Good thing they make such wonderful whiskey and cokes at the bar!

Okay… on to the day of the wedding. My girl and I got up early to get ready and fix our god-daughters hair for the wedding. They are the most adorable little 4 and 6 year olds on the planet. And yes I can say that because it’s true! Their mom, who I have been friends with for 25 years, has been wearing her hair natural with a little texturizer for the past 3 or 4 years now. When she first stopped perming her hair and got the texturizer, I was a bit shocked mostly because she didn’t look happy. Now you know how girls are, the bride called me one day and said “what are we gonna do with her hair for the wedding? It’s really long! You haven’t seen it!” I was all prepared for her to look like “Puff the Magic Negro” when she rolled up. My girl T is the resident stylist so we all knew that whatever she looked like.. T would hook her up just like she did for my wedding. But she gets there and her hair is really cute. She has it cut into a cute shape and it looks really good with her features. But why oh why did the bride tell T the same thing.. and you know what happened… T told my girl what the bride said knowing that it would hurt her feelings. My girl has some self-esteem things that are truly unfounded. Matter of fact, I told her that she needs to get some new voices for her head, because the ones she has are liars! She is a beautiful woman and she is even smaller than the rest of us after having 2 kids. We convinced her that her hair looked fine (I’m sure the bride will have commentary later) but what the hay! We were three of the sassiest bridemaids that ever were!

Except for one tiny problem… THE SHOES! All three pair were too big (the right foot on all of them was bigger than the left!) So we looked a hot mess by the foot. We were basically wearing strappy flip flops. But hell we didn’t care, what could we really do about it! So we rocked those bad boys like they were a perfect fit!

The wedding was on the Ro.yal Ca.rribb.ean cruise ship before sailing. There were about 40 people in attendance (not enough for all the expense if you ask me) which included the entire bridal party. The ship was really nice! The food was fabulous and the rum punch was ever flowing!! I’m gonna be in big trouble when I go on the cruise with my mom in December (i’m working out now!) . Overall we had a good time mostly because we were all together but I don’t know if I would have gone through all that expense. We could have had a ceremony in the backyard of their home. And I most definitely wouldn’t take my family on my blasted honeymoon! The bride looked gorgeous and the groom cleaned up well. They aren’t the most flashy couple on earth so it was nice to see them dressed up for a change!

So overall travel review…. I drank alot, I hung with my girls…. a good time was had by all! Was it worth the money???? Not really but you only live once.