I was watching the tv show Becker this afternoon after my 30 hour shift and I was moved to write this. On this episode (which I have seen a thousand times… I love this show) Becker was attempting to quit smoking and having the worst time. The question was asked of him “As a doctor, shouldn’t you know better than to smoke”. It’s funny what we KNOW we should do and what we ACTUALLY will ourselves to do. In every class there is a test. Life lessons are no different. In the confines of our mind we tell ourselves.. “smoking is bad. Overeating will kill me.” But when we have that bad day or the kids and the spouse and the boss have jumped rope with our last good nerve, we reach for our common comfort.

My mother and my aunt both smoke. My mom is 60 and my aunt is 55. I want them to live forever so I have been on them about quitting smoking. They both have that awful smoker’s cough which scares me to death mostly because I’m in medicine and I imagine the worst possible things. But really, is it any different than my addiction to all of the wrong foods? I know better. I know how it increases not only my weight but my chances of stroke, heart attack, diabetes, the list goes on and on. What’s stopping me? Me! What’s stopping my mom and aunt from quitting smoking? Them!

The movement from thought to action requires usually just one step. My mom went to the smoking cessation classes at work. She knows what to do. But the reality is, until she picks a quit date and makes that one step, she will be a smoker. Coach and I are going to work on our health habits starting when I get home from Jacksonville. We’re doing the Mas.ter Clea.nser together because we both know that we need support. I’m too young to be this out of shape. My eating habits were just as bad (if not worse) when I was in the military. Just because I exercised daily does not absolve me from the obligation to watch what I put in my mouth.

In the end of the show Becker wasn’t able to quit. He just wasn’t ready. I am ready to make some changes in my lifestyle. I’m tired of knowing what to do but not having the will and motivation to make it so. Wish me luck!