I don’t remember where I got the saying "I got to get this out my craw".  Hell, I don’t even know what a craw is.  [Just googled it, it’s the pouch on a bird where things tend to get stuck].  Anywhooo, it’s appropriate for how I’m feeling right now.

I got so much in my craw I can’t breathe.  What do I do when that happens?  I blog it out [damn, why am I humming that dang "Walk it out" song now]

Forgive me for the long post but it’s my blog… I write what I want.

- Death:

Call me morbid but I’ve always wondered what they will say about me at my funeral.  I have always wished I could be a fly on the wall at my service [Ok Lord, if there is reincarnation, please let me come back as a beautiful butterfly, not a damn fly].  Yesterday, the women’s chorus at my church sang at the memorial celebration for Nailah Franklin.  Beautiful service!  Talk about six degrees of separation.  I didn’t realize she was a member of our church, didn’t know that a friend used to date her briefly.  I felt as if I got to know her through her service.  It’s amazing how much a stranger’s life can touch you.  Our choir sang so beautifully!  I’m no holy roller but it was nothing but God.

I’m also dealing with some major illnesses in my family.  My great-aunt (who’s more grandmother than aunt) has Alzheimer’s.  She’s 91.  A few days ago she called my mom to the window (mom’s kitchen faces her bathroom.   Our building sits on a corner).  She asked for 7 cents.  My mom asked why and she said she was going to take the bus home.  She had opened the front door and everything.  Scares me shitless!  I can’t handle this.  I know she has lived a long and beautiful life but I keep having these horrible thoughts of her being missing.  She has a caretaker and the neighbor downstairs can hear her if she leaves but anything can happen!  Please pray with and for me on this issue.  My other grandmother has uterine cancer.  She’s a fussy, fiesty, onery ole lady and I can’t imagine my life without her either.  Again, pray with and for us on this one too. 

- Love and Marriage:

I know some strange folks!  One of my closest friends got married 2 weeks ago.  I don’t like his wife, never have.  I think most of the reason they got married is because they have been dating 11 years.  But anyway, that’s not the strange part.  Y’all why was he out to breakfast at 2am with us after his wedding.  She was sleepy so she went home to sleep and he went to his apartment.  Da hell!  The next day he was out with the fellas to watch the game.  Da hell!  They aren’t living together because her lease isn’t up yet. Say it with me now… Da Hell!  I called him and gave him a small piece of advice which was to treat every day of his marriage like it is new.  Nevermind the fact that you have known each other 11 years because you don’t really know each other.  This is not dating, this is new.  He seemed to appreciate that.

I’m still in love with my darling Coach but he was tweaking last week.  We’ve had a minor problem which we have been dealing with for a long time (or so I thought).  He comes to me [well actually he called me at work] to tell me that he hasn’t been the boyfriend I deserve and if I wanted to move on, he understood.  Whoa!!!!! Da Hell!  I haven’t been planning to go anywhere so I had no idea what he was tripping about.  We talked and he agreed to work on his end of the problem and I agreed to work on my end.  Hopefully that’s that and we will continue to be in sync.

Good grief I have been having too much going on.  I’ll have to share my workout news with y’all later.